T-Pain - Thr33 Ringz (2008)
I had a dream last night that reminded me of you. I had a dream that I was supposed to meet up with some friends who were waiting outside of my house, but for whatever reason, I said "yeah, I'll be out in a minute" and hid in the bathroom, peeping out a window discreetly to see if they were still there. I was paralyzed and couldn't come out of the house. I waited until they left, and I almost felt relieved. I woke up, and sometime later when thinking about that dream, I remembered how you would throw me into social situations, and if anyone ever roasted me a bit too hard, you'd step in and be like "Alright, man, relax" and shit. I'd sometimes mispronounce or mistype your roleplaying nickname that you took pride in and chose to go by, but you never even once pointed that out. You used to show me "these weird System of a Down songs I found on Limewire" and absolutely lost your shit when you discovered your new song by accident, "Ballroom Blitz" by The Sweet, a song that you blared in your headphones a little too loud that summer. Eventually, you left off for the army, and you came back safe and sound, starting a family with a girl you met when you came back home.
One early morning, probably about two years before you left for the military, I had my TV on Fuse in hopes of catching some Green Day music videos or whatever else I was into, and the music video for "Chopped 'n' Skrewed (feat. Ludacris)" came up. I -HAD- to show you it. I linked you the music video, saying something around the lines of "THIS VIDEO IS FUCKING CRAZY, PEOPLE TURN INTO ANIMALS AND SHIT AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON" and after a few minutes, you said something around the lines of "This.. This is the best thing I've ever seen, holy shit" and we'd talk about it on occasion. You even showed some people, prefacing it with stating the fact that I showed you it. You made me feel good because you appreciated something that I showed you, because you were a really cool guy, and hell, you probably still are, but we don't talk that much at all anymore, if ever. Sometimes I wanna message you and bring up this video, but I know you're too busy with your girlfriend and her kid, whom you adopted, and I'm proud of you. I really am, because it's insane to see this kid who loved roleplaying, anime, and all these other things some people might deem as "childish", and see you go through the military and put your life together in a way that makes you happy. Hell, a month or two ago, you posted a picture of your adopted daughter, only two years old or so, helping you "work" on your car's engine, and I couldn't think of a happier ending for you. I look back at the old days, and I know that it's unlikely that we'll ever build new memories together, or at least, new memories that could compete with our old insanity that only angsty, adrenaline-addicted teenagers could come up with, but I look at the fever-dream known as "Chopped 'n' Skrewed (feat. Ludacris)", and I think of you. Thank you for all that you are. Maybe one day I'll get the courage to tell you all of this.
6/10
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