Misfits - Vampire Girl / Zombie Girl (2015)

Ugh..

YOU GUESSED IT, ANOTHER RELEASE WITH ONLY TWO SONGS ON IT!! -SOMEONE- HAS A FETISH FOR IT!! Well, first, Dez Cadena is no longer in the band, which was disappointing to me at first until I realized that he never even really brought anything to the table that people wanted him to, maybe because of Jerry Only, but I was expecting Dez Cadena to bring a hardcore edge back to the band, and it just never happened. His replacement is, I fucking shit you not, Jerry Only's son, Jerry Jr. BRINGIN' THE SON INTO THE FAMILY (horror) BUSINESS, EH?! It's only a matter of time until they become the Jerry Only Family Band performing at Chuck E Cheese on Halloween night, throwing sugar-free candy to the kids by the bucket.

If you have the feeling that the songs are gonna be cheesy due to the titles, or even due to the simple fact that they're songs that Jerry Only wrote, you're pretty fucking right, but truth be told, these... Actually aren't bad songs. Don't get me wrong, they're pretty fuckin' bad for Misfits standards, much like a lot of what comes from the Jerry Only-era Misfits, but "Vampire Girl" has a certain enjoyable campiness to it that's hard to deny, and even has a guitar solo in it, which is pretty rare by Misfits standards, especially since I'm a huge fan and can't even think of another Misfits song off of the top of my head that uses one. I'm sure there are, but y'know what I mean. Unfortunately, this song has a distinctive thing holding it back that unfortunately plagues a fair bit of their discography: Jerry Only singing. He sounds a bit strained here and makes me nostalgic for the Michale Graves days.

"Zombie Girl" is arguably the better of the two songs, since it's a much higher tempo and has cooler shit going on guitar-wise than the song before it, but it's still just as cheesy as fuck due to the tiring (although oddly campy and enjoyable) opening monologue, which leads to even more guitar wankery, which is welcome in the Misfits to me because they rarely do it, and maybe Jerry Only's son is gonna bring some new shit to the table at this point, because they've already given him more of a chance to shine than Dez Cadena ever was given, which is pretty strange to me because I thought Dez Cadena was a pretty decent guitarist for a punk rock band. Oh well, if it helps the music, I'm down for it, even if the most it means is that it'll make some of the boring songs more entertaining. I wonder what Uncle Doyle thinks of Jerry Jr...

7/10
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